Desk Goals

I've always envied clean desks.  Those at the office and at home.  I can't seem to clean up my home desk.  I would do a weekly sweep, or clean-up on a Sunday.  But then when Wednesday rolls in, it looks a storm has stopped by.

aftermath

I do all my work at this table.  Work applications require that I have stable and constant internet service, which means I'm always plugged in the LAN cable.  I cannot work through wifi as signal changes quickly.  So this is where the router is, all the wires as well.  I have a printer, bills, calendar, notebooks, pens and all "necessary" stuff.

Left side

This is the left side of my table.  As you can see, it's very busy haha  The current bills to pay and other important docs are on corner.  That's where I have my pencil case is too.  I have my phones there and external hard drives.  And since I am #tanders, I have muscle pain spray.  And then air fresheners, alcohol too, coz you know, you need to sanitize regularly haha Then I have my caddy of all things, all sorts of prayer cards coz I need to pray when I send in a report :D .  Speakers, wires, a mug made by the little boy that says "World's #1".  And of course the cork board with the very special calendar to plan my days.

So yes, the left side is very very busy indeed.

On right corner

Now, moving on the right.  I have the printer at the background with papers on top of it and a catch all, to catch all things "necessary" but not urgent.  Then my notebooks - yes, I have 3 current ones and one old for references.  2 are strictly for work meeting notes, both gray and work-looking.  Red is for work too, but more for To Do lists and calendars - to track my work from home and at the ofc days haha I know I can use electronic Calendars - I do have many of those, but I like writing down things.  And then little black notebook is the for home manangement - budget, activities, schedule.  Grocery lists as well.  Then I have my mouse, I have 2.  one that's working and one that's missing the USB.  My glasses - reading and for the far. And my pink fan - so cute, right? haha

These are my pegs:

Source

This one uses the wall and it has overhead cabinets as well as drawer.  So nice, right?  And there's a calendar too!  I love calendars!
















But is my crush desk:

The ONE

It has drawers to put all my "necessaries".  Hello Calendar!  Black and white color scheme just looks so polished.  Then lots of organizers.  Love love.  How do I get this?

Onward and forward!

I've been anxious about crossing a fork in my career path lately.  And lately here is almost a year.  It's a mixture of my son turning 10, not having another baby, raising dogs instead (boy, they are as tiring as babies!), retirement looming (20 years at work is retirement) and well, getting old.  Or as millenials call it, getting #tandercats Ha!

I really was thinking of retiring in a couple of years.  Live off my pension fund and be a full time wife and Mom, to my son's dismay.  He did so express this openly, afraid that I'd be hovering 24-hours a day.  He's been trying to act independently since turning 10 and having had circumcision.

And then my husband said he was really surprised why I considered retirement.  I thought he knew I was dead serious.  And he thought I was just dreaming.  Aloud.  A lot too.

So anyways.  After that jolt, I reassessed.  I thought, hey, I do want to retire in 2 years.  5 years if I enjoyed what I'll do.  I'm thinking of moving out of my current role and do the full time work again.  I tried to send out my resume, although I was picky and it narrowed down my options.  I got an interview for a role at a semi-start up.  I went through 3 sets of interviews, but I think they found my asking salary too high.

I've spent a week at home and my son's home too as it's summer break.  I find that I really cannot imagine working full time again.  I've always been curious about online work.  They say the pay will not be as much as I'm used to initially.  But it will get better.  I think I can manage that.

Or I could go into a business.  I'm not sure what yet, but that's also another option.  I have about 2-3 years to think and plan and revise.  I feel like a fresh grad again, with few options.  But then look at me now, 18 years into the corporate world and waiting for retirement.  It can get better.  So yes, onward and forward we go!  As Buzz Lightyear says, To Infinity and Beyond!  

Be a blessing to others, everyday

I haven't been such a happy soul the past few weeks.  But yesterday, I was reminded that my family and I are quite blessed and I should be thankful.  Yes, there are bills to pay, but thankfully, there's money to pay them with.  Yes, our yaya has lapses, but thankfully, I have a yaya who takes care of us.  Yes, family and other people approach us for help, but thankfully, we can give something.  Yes, I feel I should get paid more at work, but thankfully, I have the work flexibility.  Yes, my boys are messy, but thankfully, they do make me happy.

I'm sorry if I haven't been grateful.  I really am blessed where I am now, it's not perfect and I don't have everything.  I'm grateful that the husband believes that our goal is life is not to get rich, but to be a blessing to others.  Not necessarily in big, extravagant things... but in the little things that count.  Like when I handed our yaya her sweldo and her 13th month pay, plus a little extra.  Like when we gave our barely used juicer to my sister-in-law.  Like when I gave my uneaten lunch to our manong guard.  Like when I let a construction worker go ahead of me at the grocery counter.  It's the little things, the everyday things, that you can do to be a blessing to others.  It always gives me a little high when I do little things for others, I'm dancing my happy dance - in head lang, of course :D

I hope others start doing these little things too.  It'll make you feel lighter, when you know you've done something for others.

What's next?

It'll be December in a few days.  I just got so surprised by how 2015 just few past.  I feel like I haven't done much, and at the same time, I've done too much.  My days are such extremes lately.  Some days, mostly weekdays, I don't get to interact much with people face-to-face.  All the important humans to me are out of reach during the day, so we communicate through texts, calls, viber, whatsapp, FB, iMessage, email and FT.  But despite all of that communication tools, sometimes I feel that I haven't really communicated with someone.  Face-to-face is still the way to go.

On some days though, there's just too much to do - work is neck deep and errands are just piling up.  My to-do lists are longer than the traffic on EDSA.  I love it when I tick things off.  That's done.  Yay!

When I celebrated my 15th work anniversary, I vowed to start planning for retirement at 20 years.  I've recently celebrated my 17th year and I'm nowhere near any retirement plan.  I been having sleepless nights about it. I sometimes catch myself looking at a distance and thinking about that retirement.  I know that I can't be a full time housewife, I would end up watching TV all day!  I know that I would still want to "work", but I can't go back to a 9-6 Monday-Friday work schedule.  So the only option is to open a business, but what will it be?  I have absolutely no idea!  It scares me shitless too.  I'd be 41 when I retire, still at a productive age, but with no apparent prospects.  It's like graduating from college all over again.

So, really, what's next?

Is it still a blog?

I haven't posted anything in a long while.  I do have a couple of posts in the draft folder, but just didn't get around to posting them..... I forgot why.

It's been over a year, or more, since I last posted.  So much has happened, that I don't know if I can share or when to share or how to share.  I'm thinking, I'd just start anew.

It's a rather off time to start something new, being that November isn't really a month of changes for me, or for anyone I know.  But what the heck, I'm not one to follow the bandwagon.

I'm right smack in the middle of a break-up.  No, not with the hubby.  We are still fine, and going strong.  But break-up from my mommy "friends".  "Friends" since in hindsight, I'm not sure if they really were my "friends" in it's truest form.   It's still hard for me to talk about it, and I still get puzzled every time I think about it.  I've been felt so unfriendly ever since, well, kindergarten.  If there's one thing I learned about this whole episode, is that mean girls do not really grow up, they just become mean moms :D

Anyhoo.... I'd like to say that I will post more.  Although as you've seen, I cannot promise anything.  I'd have to go though as this killer migraine is literally killing me.

Ciao!

Test of friendship

So my son's been confined at the hospital since this Wednesday.  Obviously, had to take days off from school and work. It's just me, hubby D and son K here in Laguna. Both D and I are not locals in Luzon, so we don't have family but we've lived here for more than 15 years. Those 15 years, we're able to cultivate friendships.  But some friendships are just not on the level that I thought they were. 

In the past, when I was hospitalized due to pregnancy (had lots of pre-term labor), no one from this specific set of friends visited. Even when I gave birth, only one from the group came by.  I usually get affected by this, that D started to distance himself from them, to shield me from this disappointment, he confirms recently.  

I wonder why they wouldn't take time to visit me when I would always visit them or their kids/husbands are hospitalized.  In these instances that I would take the time to visit them, D be so surprised why I would even bother. When they couldn't be bothered.  I thought and believe that even if they don't think much of our friendship, I do and I care enough. I give without expecting nothing in return.

Perhaps it's also due to how we were brought up. I grew up visiting family, relatives and friends who are sick. My Mom would know who was in the hospital, even back in the pre-FB days and would schedule a visit to each one and bring food.

Whatever it is, it's become a great struggle for me to overcome. I'm more heart broken than angry though. I hate being like this pa naman coz I find it harder to get over a broken heart than anger.  If I'm angry, I just make it a point to communicate it and I get over it. If I'm broken hearted, I retreat into myself and I avoid the other party with all my might. I always told others to take care of their hearts, I should have listened to my own advice. I should start guarding my heart.

Not that we didn't have visitors. We did, my super maasahan friend from college came by. Mommy friends from my K's school. And a couple of D's friends came by as well. One true test of friendship is showing up when your friend is in need. No show means not true friends, right? I shouldn't forget this.

Itaas ang kilay!

I used to be a make-up snob but lately I've started to like putting them on. About early last year, bought an eyebrow thing at Body Shop and been using it since.

This eyebrow make-up has two shades. A light brown one and a darker one. I used the lighter one but it looked weird since, like most Filipinas, I have dark hair. So I stuck to the darker shade. 

I don't have overgrown eyebrows. It's not too light too. I always felt they were adequate. But once I put on eyebrow make up, I felt my eyebrows looked better. 

Can you tell which one has eyebrow make up and which one doesn't? Oh and please excuse my humungous fez 😃😃